The Papier Boy

Bertha (Skull & Roses)

2010-02-12T19:52:00.004-05:00

This was inspired by one of my favorite album covers. The live double album called Grateful Dead. It is informally called Skull and Roses by some (or most). I had some old Halloween decorations, two plastic skulls, that I made a mold out of. To make the mold I covered the skull in foil, very tightly, and taped all the foil pieces together. Then I laminated paper over the entire skull with white glue. Many layers. Once dry I cut the paper and carefully removed the plastic skull. I taped the seams back up and added a few more layers of paper. The roses are store-bought cloth roses that were trimmed to size and dipped in glue to harden.

Yoda Costume

2009-11-01T12:51:00.001-05:00

There are lots of Star Wars costumes out there for babies. But they are expensive. And it's more fun to make your own. The hardest part about making a baby costume is actually obtaining the baby. There are several great websites out there that show exactly how to make a baby. I'd suggest doing a Google search for "how babies are made." Be for warned that it takes a really long time to make a baby. So if you want to be ready for next Halloween you should start pretty soon.

My wife and I already have a baby that is 6 months old. So for this costume we decided just to use the one we already have. The next thing was to decide which Star Wars character to make the costume of. My two recommendations are a Jawa and Yoda. Since our particular baby can't walk yet Yoda seemed like the better choice.

To start, I blew up a balloon about the size of our baby's head. I then covered the balloon in clothe (an old bed sheet) that was dipped in Elmers glue. Several layers were needed and it took about a week for it all to dry and become hard. This skull cap serves as a good base for Yoda's ears. To make the ears I cut some cardboard and folded and bent it into a nice ear shape. I taped the ears to the skull cap and used lots of tape to create a nice Yoda-head shape to the whole thing. To get everything nice and smooth I covered the entire head with shop towels and white glue. This creates a skin over the head. The shop towels have a texture to them so in order to smooth them out I painted on several coats of white glue, allowing each coat to dry in between. After lightly sanding I primed and painted the head green. I used some Halloween spider-web decoration stuff to create some tufts of white hair behind the ears.

Yoda needs a cane. So I made one out of newspaper and did the same shop towel/glue process on it that I did with the head and ear piece.

Next came Yoda's robe. I got some cheap fabric and traced our baby on it to create an outline of her body. I cut out two pieces of fabric and placed them together. I have no idea how to sew (I'd love to learn) so I had to use glue to attach the two pieces together. I quick slit up the middle of the robe's front finished it off. I used some old brown faux fur that I had to make a little belt.

The costume went together really quickly and looked pretty cute. The baby seemed to enjoy wearing it and thought the cane tasted good.

Origins

2009-06-13T19:42:00.006-05:00

About a month ago I had a child. I have found that this is pretty hard work. It is also very time consuming. I am constantly "at the ready;" at any given moment I must be prepared to drop everything and do one of three things 1) sooth a crying baby 2) wipe fecal matter and urine from a baby's butt 3) help my wife in any number of ways. Because of my constant on-call status I am unable to partake in my #1 favorite hobby: being up to my elbows in glue and newspaper. I will start back up again as soon as possible.

In the meantime, I was paging through some old photo albums and came across some pics of art projects from years ago. Some of these involved paper mache. These were all done before I began taking the art seriously and well before I stumbled upon my main inspirations Dan Reeder and Louie Rochon.

Firstly, we have some pinatas. These are classic paper mache projects that everyone has made at some point. Back in college I made these for my nephew's birthdays; one was an alien themed party and the other was a race car themed party.

As a teenager, we decided to prepare a Halloween display for my house. Of course, in typical teenager fashion, we decided this on October 30th. So while this is high concept it is low quality. This was back when X-Files was big and Fox had just released the Alien Autopsy special. The idea of our display was that the kids would approach the autopsy scene and take the candy from the dissected alien's abdomen. Despite the crudeness of the display it was a hit with the neighborhood kids.

In the past few years I have really taken paper mache seriously. But it is fun to look back on these old projects from before I knew what I was doing.

Harold and the not-so-Purple Crayon

2009-04-19T18:03:00.006-05:00

My wife and I are expecting a baby any day now. As part of the "nesting" ritual that all of the books said we would go through we decided to decorate the room. We discussed several ideas and decided on a Harold and the Purple Crayon theme since we both like that book. My wife did not want purple though so I told her she could pick any color she wanted and we would just make it a Harold and the Whatever Crayon theme. I have found it best not to argue with pregnant people. She picked pink.

I started out by sketching the mural, a Japanese cherry tree, and a large crescent moon. The idea was that Harold would be sleeping on the moon after having been up all night drawing. The moon is essentially a shadow box in the shape of a moon with a frame and a piece of frosted plexi-glass covering the front. I through it would be really bitchin' to have the moon light up so I added a low voltage LED light and covered it with red tissue paper so that it would glow pink.

Harold started simply as a series of newspaper balls taped together and covered in strips and paste. His head was an amalgam of balloon shapes. For his PJ's I used a "newborn jumper" (that's what my wife said it was; It looked like footy pajamas to me) that was cut up and soaked in glue and applied to Harold's naked body.

After painting, I mounted the moon in place and prepared Harold for his eternal slumber (or at least until the baby can think for herself and decides she wants a Hannah Montana themed room ((at which time she will be sent to an orphanage))

I think it turned out OK and not too creepy. I hope the kid likes it. I'm sure she'll tell me if she doesn't

Killer Klown Gun UPDATE...

2009-04-06T19:28:00.006-05:00

I sold the Killer Klown gun to some clown down in West Virginia. Note: None of the words in the last sentence contained any sarcasm or exaggeration. I literally sold the gun to a girl, who is a clown in West Virgina. She also happens to be a fantastically talented artist. Check out her stuff immediately:

CrimsonSacrifice (aka Boogle the Clown)

Boogle (this page is a little risque, kids)

Credit: this unbelievable art to the left is by B.V. Scott;

Link: http://crimsonsacrifice.deviantart.com/art/Boogle-the-Clown-96929747

Put your ray gun to my head...

2009-02-24T19:29:00.005-05:00

Finally finished the Killer Klowns from Outer Space ray gun this week. It took forever because of some other personal projects that I had been working on.

The gun is inspired by the small ray gun pistol from the Killer Klowns movie that I love so much. In the movie, the gun captures its targets in a cotton candy cocoon.

This sculpture started out as a balloon. I took screen shots with my digital camera of scenes from the movie to get an idea of what the gun looked like. Luckily, the DVD had an 'extras'section that had concept-art of all of the weapons that appear in the movie:

I tried to capture my cat, Kal-El, in a cocoon but it didn't work.

Next on the agenda is a mural and paper sculpture for our baby's room.

Orthopedic Surgery

2009-02-09T20:13:00.005-05:00

I noticed that the right arm of my Farrah Fossil sculpture has slowly drooped since she was finished back in early 2007. The arm was now less than 1cm from the base. I decided it was time for surgery. I broke the arm off at the joint and removed any of the excess glue. I mixed some epoxy and repositioned the arm in its proper place. Afte the expoxy set I reinforced the arm with some fine thread to prevent this from happening again. I also used a piece of clothes hanger to further spread her ribs out which will also help prevent any reoccurances. Almost good as new.

The Future of Paper Mache?

2008-12-23T19:46:00.003-05:00

The Dr. said she has already glued the umbilical cord to her hand at least once. The hot glue gun is wreaking havoc on the uterine wall.
Estimated completion: May 2009.

Papier Mache Kitchen

2008-12-01T20:53:00.007-05:00

I have no papier mache sculpture to share right now. I have not had any time to create lately because I am remodeling my kitchen. It is a lot of work. It was kind of fun at first but I am no longer amused. The kitchen currently looks like a bomb went off in it. But I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Once I finish I will get right back to paper mache and my wife can start yelling at me again for dripping glue on the floor and making a mess when I clean out my airbrush.
In the meantime, take a look at some awesome creations that other people have made: Clicky

Mr. Kite

2008-09-17T17:47:00.009-05:00

I finished this garden gnome sculpture and it turned out OK. I loosely based his design on the costumes from Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. I suppose, since it is green and orange, that this would be John. But I didn't really intend that to be.

I started with an armature of wooden dowels and newspaper balls. I used paper mache, newspaper, and tape to build the body features. I got some plastic eyes on eBay. This is the first time that I am using pre-made eyes...never used them before. The eyes give him more of a living quality and, quite frankly, make him look a tad creepy. To create the ears I bent some wire and covered it with paper towel.

His clothing is cloth, dipped in glue, and drapped over his body. I made the hat just like a real hat; by drop-stitching two triangles together. I took a walk to Black Rock Woods in Nazareth and got a nice dry stick to use as a walking stick. The gnome has a guitar case strapped to his back so I made one out of cardboard.

I used a lot of old buttons and faux leather from some old purses that my wife had tried to throw away. She tries to throw stuff away without me knowing.

R.I.P. Rick Wright

Annelid King (Comeback Special)

2008-06-22T17:16:00.006-05:00

I finished my worm-Elvis-impersonator sculpture today. It turned out OK. This was a sculpture that I started back in March but had to put aside to work on my soap box car.

The worm is just a series of newspaper balls covered with laminated paper mache. I created a display base out of MDF that includes various pieces of flora that might exist in a backyard (leaves, flowers, rocks, mushrooms, etc.). I made a miniature guitar that my wife had fun posing our cat with. I tried to loosely model it after Elvis' 1968 ebony Gibson J200. I added some jewel embelishments to the guitar strap and used a pearlized white paint for the accents. The sculpture is 18 inches tall and 25 inches long.

Catharsis

2008-05-27T19:55:00.003-05:00

Although there is the prospect of another Soapbox Derby in the Autumn, it was time to disassemble my Dragon Coupe. I decided to save the dragon's head so I carefully removed the dragon and cut the head off with a hacksaw.

I mounted the head, trophey-style, on an old piece of wood.

Nazareth Adult Soapbox Derby 2008 Slideshow

2008-05-04T10:49:00.008-05:00

Created with Admarket's flickrSLiDR.

1st Place: 2nd Place:

3rd Place: Crowd Pleaser:

Full results bracket: CLICK HERE!

VIDEO: CLICK HERE!

Dragon Coupe (Soap Box Derby Car)

2008-05-01T17:20:00.004-05:00

As mentioned in a previous post I entered the Nazareth Adult Soap Box Derby. I did research online about the designs of soapbox cars but found that most are really lame. I started building my car in March and decided that I would use my talents as much as possible to make the fastest and best looking car possible. I am good at paper art but bad at carpentry so I focused on making a mechanically simple design that incorpated paper art. I started by recording a few goals: 1) The car should look good

2) Use as many reclaimed materials as possible

3) Spend as little money as possible

I. The Chasis

I collected as much scrap wood as I possibly could from people's garbage piles around town. I started with a sheet of plywood and built a body out of 2X3 studs. These studs were the only wood that I bought from a store. They cost me about $8 total. All other wood was reclaimed scrap wood.

II. Wheels

I got some lawn mower wheels from my wife's grandfather. They did not have an axl. Rather, they each had their own mounting bracket. This would simplify things by allowing me to use 2x4's as axls rather than worrying about finding a metal rod.

III. Steering

The steering was going to be important. I needed to be able to straignten myself out but didn't really need to make any sharp turns (W. Prospect Street hill is perfectly straight). So I knew I could limit the steering capabilities. Many of the online plans I found had steering columns much like a real car. But these were far too complicated in my opinion. So I decided to make a foot-steering mechanism. I drilled a 0.5" hole through the deck and two 2X4's. Then I sandwiched the deck between the two 2x4's and bolted it all together. This way I could manipulate the axl under the deck with the 2x4 that is above the deck.

IV. Brakes

The rules of the derby stated that brakes were optional. However, I knew I wanted to add them because I did not know the logistics of the race at the time: would there be ample room to slow down naturally? Or would there be some sort of smashing-into-hay-bails type end to the race?

So I decided to make a simple brake mechanism. I contemplated having something rub against one of the wheels. However this seemed complicated and would intrude on the aesthetics of the car. So I read online that old soapbox cars from the WWII era had a pad that would rub against the road surface to slow the car down. I decided that this would be perfect because I could mount the brake inside the cockpit. I cut a lever shape out of an old 2X8" and cut a hole in the floor of the car. I made a fulcrum point using an old piece of metal conduit. For a brake pad I used a piece of an old bicycle tire. With this system I could pull up on the lever to force the brake pad against the ground. A small bungie cord served to snap the brake lever back into place when pressure was released.

V. Body

I obtained a piece of 1/8" plywood from my neighbor (he had been throwing a lot of wood out lately from some home improvement projects he was doing). This would be perfect to form the body of my car. I made a roadster design and included some fins in the back.

Design and Detail: I had comtemplated various themes and design elements for the car before I started building it. In my notebook I had every famous car I could think of from TV, movies , music, and pop culture. But nothing was really appealing. But I recently purchased Dan Reeder's new book Dragon Maker's Handbook. This inspired me to create a medievil themed car. I came up with the idea to have the car be covered with dragon scales and have a prominent dragon hood ornament.

Dragon Hood Ornament: I am not going to detail how the dragon was made because Dan Reeder does a good job in his book. If you're interested in learning his techniques you should buy it. Basically, it is a series of newspaper balls covered with glue-soaked cloth. My technique differs from Dan's only slightly in that I use some traditional paper mache and also paper towels in places were he may only use cloth.

The dragon would need to be very strong (much stronger than if it would just hang on the wall for decoration). So it was heavily reinforced with wire and paper mache. In order to attach the dragon to the hood of the car I needed to create a mounting bracket. So I cut the bottom of the dragon's body open and inserted a section of wood. This was further reinforced with paper mache (which dries as hard as a rock in about a week). This would allow me to screw up through the car's hood to attached the dragon.

VIII. Helmet

Race rules state that the driver must wear a helmet. So I got my old dirt bike helmet from my parent's attic. I took off the visor, sanded it, and painted it silver...like a knight's helmet. I make a knight's visor out of cardboard and glued it to the helmet. To make it look more authentic I "distressed" the helmet with some black paint and also attached some faux "rivets" which were actually nail and screw heads.

IX. Paint job and Scales

To create the scales I cut an old bedsheet into squares (roughly 1.5 inches). I used two whole bedsheets. I put some Elmer's glue in a bucket and diluted it slightly with water. Normally, for regular scupture I would not dilute it. But I was trying to be resourceful on this project and diluting it woul make the gallon of glue last longer. A handful at a time I dunked the squares in the glue and allowed them to soak. The I squeezed the excess glue out. Each scale is one square of cloth that has two corners folded over. This was applied to the body of the car in an overlapping fashion. It took a while to dry in the cool Spring air.

I opted for a red paint job with yellow accents. To achieve this I first painted the entire car solid yellow. Then I lightly painted the car red making sure not to take advantage of the nature texture of the scales and not apply a solid coat.

X. Details

There were a few details of note that I added to the car.
The first was an emblem on the front grill. I made this out of papermache and cardboard. A fancy button finished it off:

I made a Pennsylvania lisence plate for the back. This was also made of paper mache and cardboard. I also made a witty bumper sticker:

I gathered some old knobs and what-not to add to the dashboard. I even put added a key and speedometer (actually an old pressure guage):

Work Stoppage

2008-03-23T19:36:00.009-05:00

I had been working on a new sculpture of a worm. However, a few things have come up that are forcing me to put it aside for now. The first is work-related. The second is because I need to prepare for the Nazareth Adult Soap Box Derby on May 3.

The Mannequin Project 2005-2008

2008-03-18T19:59:00.004-05:00

The Mannequin Project is now finished. My mother-in-law finished the cape. I attached the cape with some snaps and affixed a yellow emblem to the back. The emblem is made of craft foam and outlined with black thread. Here is a link to the original Mannequin Project post: Clicky

Paper Mache Poo (& some stars)

2008-02-24T10:52:00.007-05:00

I made some stars out of paper mache. They turned out OK. Rather than paint them I decoupaged them with tissue paper. I gave one to my mom.

I also made some paper mache poop but make cat could tell it was fake.

C.F. Marlin Guitar Sculpture

2008-02-06T21:26:00.000-05:00

For some reason I had recently become infatuated by Picasso's Guitar (link) which is a sheet metal interpretation of the instrument. I was really inspired by the fact that he used such crappy materials rather than bronze or copper or something like that. So, I decided to make my own fantastical interpretation of a guitar using the crappiest material I know of: paper.

I live in Nazareth, PA. home of C.F. Martin Guitars, one of the oldest (if not the oldest) guitar manufacturers in the USA. The original factory is within a few blocks of my house. So it made sense that I would model my fantastical guitar after a Martin. And since Martin is only one letter off from "marlin" I figured that the most obvious place to start the design would be with a fish theme (it made sense to me at the time).

First I measured my own guitar to get the dimensions of the neck, the body, and get all of the ratios right. Then I sketched out the basic shape of the guitar. I always felt that guitars kind-of look like skeletons. So instead of making a regular "live" fish guitar I designed a fish skeleton guitar.

Next, I made the fish skull/guitar body out of a big ball of newspaper (The Nazareth Key, as always) and covered it in newspaper and flour/water mixture. When dry I hollowed the skull out. Then I traced the shape of the skull onto a piece of MDF, added the guitar neck/fish backbone shape, and cut it all in one piece. This one-piece design would give the sculpture great strength and rigidity.

Using wire, newspaper, cardboard and tape I added some fin and tail details. The vertebrae details were created from some old pink foam insulation I had left over from a home improvement project. I glued the foam to the neck and carved each vertebrae with a knife and sandpaper. Each space between the vertebrae represents a guitar fret. So to mimic a real guitar I made the vertebrae near the nut larger than those near the the bridge.

I used lots of "true" paper mache to create little details and to smooth all of the edges on the fish. "True" paper mache is simply paper pulp, white glue, a little saw dust, and some calcium carbonate. This can be sculpted like clay and dries extremely hard.

I made the teeth out of Sculpey.

I wanted the guitar to be mildly authentic so I made a nut and bridge out of Scupley and drilled holes for the strings. I used old guitar strings and strung up the Marlin. Lead split-shot were used to hold the strings taught at the nut.

The entire sculture was covered in paper towles, primed with gesso, painted with acrylics, airbrushed for detail, and sealed with water-based polyurethane. I added a C.F. Marlin logo to the headstock/tail and created a parchment sound hole label.

If this were a real guitar it would probably be the worst sounding piece of crap on Earth and very uncomfortable to play. But it's a sculpture and not real so I don't have to worry about that.

Condolences to Mr. Imagination

2008-01-23T18:02:00.001-05:00

Sadly, visionary outsider artist Gregory "Mr. Imagination" Warmack's Bethlehem, PA home was burned January 20. He lost his home, studio, pets, and precious artwork. I have no doubt that Mr. I will recover to be more creative than ever.

Links to Newspaper articles about the house fire:

January 22

January 23

The Nazareth Stink Bug

2007-09-26T17:19:00.000-05:00

Everybody who lives in the Lehigh Valley knows too well what a brown stink bug is. In the Summer these things are everywhere; in the house, on the house, outside of the house, in stores, at the post office, in your shoe, on your car, everywhere. Originally from Asia, the brown stink bug was introduced to this area in the 1990's presumably stowed away on a some cargo from China. The first one in North America was identified in Allentown, PA. They now occupy much of the mid-Atlantic. The reason that they are called "stink bugs" is because, when provoked, they emit a odoriferous liquid spray. It kind of smells like a cross between sun baked monkey vomit, worsteshire sauce marinated dog crap, and narcotizing flesh. The best thing is when you suck one up into the vacuum cleaner. It fills the entire house up with the seductive sent of sun baked monkey vomit, worsteshire sauce marinated dog crap, and narcotizing flesh. You also have to throw away a perfectly good vacuum bag.

I decided to honor the stink bug with a papier mache sculpture. First I needed to find one. Where would I look? How about anywhere? I immediately found three on a window screen at my house. I put them into a jar and kept them there while I sketched and studied their figures. Unfortunately, they all died while in custody. When I opened the jar to take some photos I could sense the strong odor of sun baked monkey vomit, worsteshire sauce marinated dog crap, and narcotizing flesh.

I started but making a body out of styro foam. I only had scraps of foam left over from previous projects but I needed a decent sized block. So I glued a bunch of pieces together. Then I cut the block to shape and sanded it. A stink bug has a de-stink-tive (get it?) shield-shaped back. So I constructed this out of cardboard. The head is foam and Model Magic. The legs and antennae are wire and masking tape. To create details on the wings I used sheets of paper towel, double ply, brushed with wallpaper paste. Then everything was covered in paper towels soaked in glue. After several coats of white glue, sanding, and gesso, the insect was ready for painting. I used diluted acrylic craft paint applied through an airbrush.

I thought that it would be interesting to showcase the stink bug by mounting it on a plaque. So I cut a plaque out of MDF and covered it in newspaper. I liked the way the newspaper looked without paint so, when I applied the second coat, I strategically chose interesting articles, pictures to cover the plaque with. The two newspapers that I used are The Nazareth Key and The Onion. This is probably one of the only stink bug sculptures that has the word "labia" printed right on the sculpture.

While obtaining photographs of stink bugs online I learned the genus-species name of stink bugs. It is Halyomorpha halys. So I went through magazines from our recycle bin to get all of the letters to add to the stink bug plaque. The magazines that I used were This Old House, Electronic Gaming Monthly, Allure, and Women's Health. I decoupaged the letters on the plaque and sealed it all with polyurethane.

The stink bug was mounted on the plaque using wooden dowels. Mounting hooks were added to the back of the plaque so that it can hang on the wall.

"Alligator in the Sewers"

2007-08-18T10:18:00.001-05:00

I finished the alligator sculpture. It turned out OK. As posted earlier, I obtained an old toilet from my wife's grandparents earlier in the year. As one to never pass up any free junk I pondered what to do with it. I finally settled on creating a sculpture based on a common urban legend-the alligator in the sewer.

I started out as I typically do by creating a series of newspaper balls; paying close attention to what the end result should look like. I attached the arms together and fixed those to the body. To create the head, I cut the ball in half, one for each part of the jaw. I used wooden dowels to reinforce the jaw and keep it open and shaped properly. One dowel was forced in under the chin, as if being stabbed through the Adam's apple. The other dowel went straight through the top of the head down into the body.

To create the textured, convoluted gums and mouth I used paper towels, soaked in white glue, to cover the surface and create a lot of wrinkles. I made teeth out of Sculpey and glued them in place. To create the claws (hands) I first made bones out of small newspaper balls and connected them with heavy wire. I used more newspaper and tape to create the flesh of the hands.

To ensure that the alligator would stand inside the toilet I made a form by covering the inside of the bowl with plastic wrap and using strips of newspaper and flour/water to make a relief of the bowel. Once this dried, I attached it to the base of the alligator body and used paper towels/glue to create a slimy, toilet-water effect.

The entire body and head needed to be covered in a specific reptile-like texture. So I used paper towels soaked in glue to create wrinkles and scales and details.

Once everything was dry I then primed the entire piece with gesso and painted with various shades of black, green, red, and, brown. My airbrush helped create some of the blending and shading. The entire alligator was covered with water based polyurethane- glossy on the inside of the mouth and eyes; satin on the skin.

To create a base for the toilet I used a piece of MDF. Since the scupture would be heavy (it is a real toilet, you know) I put some casters on the bottom. I cut 3" squares of old 1/8" plywood and glued them to the MDF base in a "bathroom tile" pattern. This was covered entirely with papertowels/glue, primed, and painted to resemble a typical American bathroom floor. The toilet was then bolted to the base and reassembled.

I obtained an old toilet plunger and broke the handle in half. It did not break as spectacularly as I had hoped so I fudged it a bit by using a utility knife to enhance the splintering and glued some extra splinters on. Then I glued the plunger in the 'gator's claws to imply that the animal had just snapped the handle in two.

This is one of my favorite pieces that I have done and I am fairly pleased with it. I think the hands could have been a little better- they are a tad too human-looking.

I would say that working with an old toilet was pretty crappy.

Philadelphia Eagles Training Camp 2007

2007-08-01T11:01:00.000-05:00

It is no secret that I love the Philadelphia Eagles. I am an Eagles-apologist. The team holds training camp at Lehigh University in Bethlehem, PA. in mid summer. Since this is only a 20 minute drive from my house I take a week-day off from work and go every year (Click here for what I saw in 2006). Here is what I saw this year:

During some D-line drills, one of the coaches uses a football attached to a broom handle to simulate the slight movement of a snapping ball.

Garbage Pail Kids Sculpture Controversy

2007-06-15T20:22:00.000-05:00

I recieved an e-mail yesterday from Wayne of Wayne's Garbage Pail Kids Reference Page with an interesting story about an artist who made a Garbage Pail Kids sculture and tried to sell it on eBay. The artist was met with a legal letter warning about copyright infringement. The interesting point of the story was that the warning did not come from Topps, maker of Garbage pail Kids Cards. Rather, it came from Mattel, maker of Cabbage Patch Kids Dolls. The artist had modified an old Cabbage Patch Doll to make a custom Garbage Pail Kid. Sound familiar?

While I have not attempted to sell them, I have created several Garbage Pail Kids sculptures; often using a Cabbage Patch Doll as my starting point.

Here is a link to the story on Wayne's site message board: http://www.wgpkr.com/GPK/MessageBoard/Messages/20140.html

I have to wonder if anything would have happened at all if the listing simply did not mention Cabbage Patch Kids at all. Here is the eBay listing of the offending doll:

This is not the first time Mattel has sent their legal team after an individual artist. Read it here. I realize that Mattel is not crazy about the concept of the "Garbage Pail Kid." I recall lawsuits years ago between Topps and Mattel over the Garbage Pail Kids cards themselves. As a creative entity, myself, I can certainly understand the desire to protect intellectual property. However, this was not an instance of mass-producing, mass-profiting, or mass-marketing. This was a lone artist expressing herself and using her talents to make just a few dollars.

I recently obtained a whole box of Cabbage Patch Kids at a yardsale. Now I am even more motivated to chop their heads off and create the most vial Garbage Pail Kids I can come up with. Maybe I'll even try and sell them on eBay.

Summertime Blues (and reds)

2007-05-28T16:01:00.000-05:00

I'm not a huge fan of Summer. I mostly prefer Autumn and, to a lesser extent, Spring. Winter isn't bad either. Summer is definitely a distant fourth. There are a few reasons that I don't like Summer. Mainly because it is too freaking hot. I also don't like the humidity or the blazing sun.

However, I am far more active in Summer; I do a lot of home-repair/improvement stuff in the Summer. This often keeps me from doing paper mache sculpture. But this stuff needs to be done.

Currently, I am working on repairing the wood siding on my house. It is made of cedar shingles and some of the shingles are in need or replacement. Then, once the replacements are in, I'll stain them to (hopefully) make them match the originals. It is hard work. My knuckles are sore and bloody.

On hold is a sculpture that I have been working on for a while. I obtained an old toilet from my wife's grandparents last Winter. I had been pondering a way to make a sculpture out of it that won't offend anyone. I settled on an alligator-in-the-sewer. I thoroughly scrubbed the toilet out with copious amounts of bleach and a garden hose. I got most of the old-people smell out of it. Then I constructed a base out of a piece of MDF and attached casters (wheels) to the bottom. This sculpture is going to be heavy and the wheels will make it easier to move around. The alligator itself is made of newspaper balls covered in newspaper. That's about where I have left it. My vision is clear...now I have to find some time for the execution.

A Gold Fish

2007-04-11T16:47:00.000-05:00

I have a fairly ambitious project planned for the Spring/Early Summer so I decided to do something simple to gear up. So I thought I would make another fish. I started with a wad of newspaper and built from there. The scales, dorsal fin, and tail are made of an old bedsheet. The pectoral fins and gill plate are cardboard. The skin is paper towels. I used a yellow-gold paint as the undercoat and a metallic "14k" gold paint for the final coat. The plaque is made of MDF.

The fish body is attached to the plaque using two bolts. The sculpture is designed to hang on the wall like a trophy fish. It is roughly 24" tall and 36" long.

I liked the way it turned out. But there are some things I would have done differently like adding additional textural detail to the tail. To me, the tail looks too plain. Other than that, it was a nice distraction.

Farah Fossil

2007-02-25T21:12:00.000-05:00

I completed my Farah Fossil sculpture the other day. It turned out OK. It took a really long time because it has so many pieces. All together, there are 139 separate bones:

26 vertbrae
14 teeth
1 Mandible
1 Cranium
2 Scapula
10 Ribs
2 Femur
2 Fibula
2 Tibia
22 Foot/ankle bones
26 Hands and Wrist
24 Pigtail bones
1 Pelvis
2 Humerus
2 Radius
2 Ulna

I started by making a base and spine shape out of MDF and mounting the spine-shape to the base with two dowels. Each vertebrae was made from foam and afixed to the MDF spine-shape. Then the ribs (cardboard and wire) were added. This was all covered with paper towels and glue. The skull is a large newspaper ball. Each bone was created using either rolled-up newspaper, cardboard, or Model Magic clay. Some bones, like the long bones, are glued in place. Others, are held together by wire.

The whole thing was covered with paper towels, primed with gesso, painted with acrylics and aged with dark brown paint shot through an airbrush.

The Mannequin Project 2005-20??

2006-12-20T13:12:00.000-05:00

Studies indicate that a typical American driver does not pay 100% attention to the road. The mind is divided between the minimal amount of skill required to operate a motor vehicle and something else. Hunters may have one eye in the woods looking for the next great hunting spot. Some guys have one eye on the hot chick in the mall parking lot. My wife always seems concerned with whatever is broadcasting from the car speakers. I always have one eye on peoples' trash cans and dumpsters.

In January 2005, while commuting home from work, I noticed a pair of human legs sticking out of a garbage can near the town square of Nazareth, Pennsylvania. I immediately pulled over to investigate. As I got closer to the trash can I discovered that my prayers had been answered. The trash can contained the single greatest item that any hipster, dooface, trash-picker could possibly covet...a mannequin. I was beside myself. I loaded it into the back of my pickup, sped home, and unloaded it into my garage for closer inspection. It was in pretty good shape. It wasn't particularly new. It had a stand. It had both arms. But it was missing both hands. Oh, and it was a female.

The next few weeks were spent deciding what to do with it. The possibilities were nearly endless. Could it become:

A french maid?
A monster?
A sexy nurse?
A character from any number of movies?

But the answer became obvious. Since the age of about 7 or 8 I had developed what some may describe as an unhealthy obsession with all things Superman. It was clear that my new mannequin needed to become Supergirl.

First thing was to clean it up. Then I got all of the applicable paint colors: blue, red, yellow, and flesh tone. I sprayed the head and legs the flesh tone. It was paler than I had wanted. She looked a little like a meth-addict. But it would have to do.

Next, I masked-off the collar where the costume meets the neck and the legs where the boots would meet the legs. I sprayed the boots red and the torso and arms blue. Those colors looked great.

For the Superman "S," I began by masking-off a diamond shape in the center of her "fun bag" region. I painted this yellow. Using some red foam from the craft store and a razor knife I cut out the outline of the "S" and attached it to the chest so the yellow diamond was the background. This looked pretty good.

Yes, I do have a vinyl copy of Beauty and the Beat

I used black paint and a brush to add detail to the boots.

At this point I was done painting and needed to move on to the fabric. I went to the fabric store and bought some red fabric that matched the paint pretty well. I got enough for the skirt and cape. The problem was I have no idea how to sew. But there was one person who could. My step-mother-in-law is a home-economics teacher. She is very talented at all things crafty and is exceptional with fabric and stuff like that. She said she would help me. She came over and took some measurements and started right away using a portable sewing machine. It was far more complicated that I had imagined and would require additional time. In fact, the cape still is not done yet.

Sewing is Complicated

For the belt, I used a piece of yellow craft foam. I attached it using Velcro. I used more foam to make the yellow "S" insignia that will emblazion the cape, when finished.

While the mannequin is not completed yet, I can still enjoy her company. Once I get the cape finished, I'll take more pictures.

Jar of Buttons

2006-12-09T21:09:00.000-05:00

I made a little Screamer* head as a gift for someone. It is for someone who likes sewing and stuff so it is appropriately themed.

*If you don't know what a Screamer is then you should get this book immediately: A Simple Screamer

Breakfast of Champions

2006-11-01T21:08:00.000-05:00

I love inspirational movies. A movie that recently inspired me is Better Off Dead. Here are the ways that this movie has inspired me:

1) In the begining of the movie there is a scene where Lane's father discovers that his youngest son has clipped out all of the coupons from the back of the cereal boxes. However, he didn't wait until the cereal boxes were empty. The cereal spills all over the place and hilarity ensues. I like comedy that involves cereal. So I decided to incorporate breakfast cereal into my new paper mache sculpture.

2) Througout the film it is implied that Lane's mother is a horrible cook. One evening she is serving dinner to the family. It is a green, slimy, goo with some suspended matter in it. Shortly after she spoons some onto Lane's plate the goo begins to throb and eventually crawls off the plate and onto the table. I like monster-food. So I decided to incorporate a monster and food into my new paper mache sculpture.

3) In the movie, Lane gets a job at a burger joint called Pig Burgers. Since Lane is not a very ambitious fellow he soon lapses into a daydream while manning the grill. His fantasy consists of a personified hamburger dancing and singing to Van Halen's "Everybody Wants Some" off of their Best of Both Worlds album. I like the singing hamburger and "Everybody Wants Some" is one of Van Halen's best tunes. So I decided to incorporate a singing entity into my new paper mache sculpture.

I used several non-paper based items in this scuplture. These include a spoon, a juice glass, an old milk bottle, and some black hair from an old Halloween mask. I also used real breakfast cereal. I wasn't confident that real cereal would hold up very long despite the large amounts of preservatives in it. So I decided to forgo gluing it or permanently attaching the cereal to the sculpture. I used Applejacks. When I was a kid, in the 1980's, Applejacks where one color: kind of a light-orange color. But now, for some reason, Applejacks also contain some green pieces too. I don't know why they have to change things. Was there a problem with the original color of the Applejacks? Where they not selling well? Has the color change increased sales? I wonder if it is the same reason that they added all of the new Lucky Charms marbits. Anyhoo, I picked all of the green Applejacks out and ate those.

My cat liked his beard

Overall, I am fairly satisfied with this piece. The cereal box turned out OK. It isn't really how I envisioned it, but it is OK. I didn't want the box to be the focus of the sculpture so the minimal amount of detail that I used is probably to my advantage. One thing I don't like is the lettering. In the furture I should probably try and find a good way to make nice lettering.

Here is something cool. While surfing the web for a mail order bride, I stumbled upon another sculpture of Smelly Sally. It is from Argentina. Take a look: Click Here

Domo arigato, Mr. Roy Bot-o

2006-09-23T20:04:00.000-05:00

Roy Bot is finished. It didn't go off without a hitch though. One issue was that I used Super Sculpey to construct the hands. This was a big mistake. Super Sculpey is very heavy. I would guess that each hand was about 200g. I attached the hands with a product called Liquid Nails. You'd think that with a name like "Liquid Nails" the stuff would hold very well. But this was not the case. It seemed to be taking a very long time to cure to hardness even after sitting in front of the dehumidifier for 48 hours. I checked the tech sheet online for Liquid Nails and it says that the cure time for maximum strength is 14 days. So I figured I'd let the project sit while I went to Colorado for business. But when I came back, the hands had already fallen off.

I found another scultable product called Model Magic. It is made by Binny & Smith which is based here in Pennsylvania, just a few miles down the road. Model Magic is as light as foam. But it can be sculpted like clay. It takes about 24 hours to harden. When cured, the product is very lightweight, spongy, smooth, and paintable. When painted, the sculpey hands look exactly like the Model Magic hands. This was perfect. I just wish I would have thought of it before.

The only problem with Model Magic is that it cannot be stored after opening. It comes in foil packs of various sizes. I bought a bucket of four 6oz packets. Once you open one of the foil packs you have to use the entire package. The unused portion will cure if you use it our not. Once that package is open the product starts curing and the process cannot be stopped. So I have also learned that while larger packs may seem more economical, smaller packages are better since there is less waste and unused product.

I realize that the American flag is a little hokey. I am not sure that I like it. I made it to add structural support to the sculpture and keep the torso from flexing at the waist. But I did not glue it on so I can remove it any time I want. It isn't really needed since the sculpture is pretty secure by itself. To me, it seems a little gratuitously patriotic.

Some odds & ends that I used on this piece are wire nuts and bobbin spools for the wrist rockets (orange things), telephone jacks for the rear electronics, and discharge hose for the legs and arms. I also added some electrical wires inside the abdomen too. I found some decals from a chemical safety brochure and a safety label from a bottle of 70% isopropanol (I work at a chemical company) and attached them to the fuel tank.

Philadelphia Eagles Training Camp 2006

2006-08-25T16:56:00.000-05:00

It is no secret that I love the Philadelphia Eagles. I am an Eagles-apologist. The team holds training camp at Lehigh University in Bethlehem, PA. in mid summer. Since this is only a 20 minutes drive from my house I take a week-day off from work and go every year. Here are a few things I saw this year:

1) During certain special-teams drills, some of the players put an orange skull cap over their helmets. It makes the players look silly:

2) Swoop, the Eagles mascot, had an extremely filthy costume. It looks like it hasn't been washed in a really long time. But this guy didn't mind:

3) The man sitting next to me had a shirt-pocket full of pens, markers, and highlighters. He also had a folder full of spreadsheets, notes, and graphs with all kinds of statistics about the players and teams of years gone by. He took a few notes throughout the practice on his notepad. I overheard someone ask him if he was a reporter and he said "No." He mentioned to someone nearby that his wife packed him some sunscreen this year.

4) Here are some more random pictures from my day:

Smelly Sally Lives

2006-08-06T19:52:00.000-05:00

The Smelly Sally sculpture is finished. It is based upon the Garbage Pail Kid series 3 card #108a. It turned out OK...I'm not thrilled with it. I would probably even go as far as saying I am unhappy with it. I think the head is too small and the colors are not quite right. This project has put me in "a bad place." But I took some photos of the process anyway and tried my best to detail each step:

The first thing I did was make some sketches based upon the card. I can draw OK. But please don't judge my abilities from this picture. I used a small ruler to get the proportions and used the proportions and the dimensions of the doll's head to determine the size of the sculpture overall. I figured that 1cm on the card equalled 7.7cm on the sculpture. Even though I am in America I usually use the metric system. It just makes more sense. I believe that the US should adopt the metric system officially.

Much of the sculpture is made of newspaper. I like to use "The Nazareth Key," which is a free weekly newspaper that comes in the mail. I don't read it. But I save all of the issues in a bin for times just like this. 'The Key' isn't really a "newspaper" since it doesn't actually report any news. Mainly it is just full of advertisements and announcements for Kiwanis club meetings, Dean's list, etc. But since it is printed on newsprint, I will call it "newspaper" from here on.

Here is where the first thing unwittingly went wrong. For the sculpture's body, I needed balls of newspaper of various size. I tried to estimate the size of the "body" balls as best as possible with the understanding that the head is slightly larger than the torso. I made the ball too big because I did not take into consideration that the newspaper ball is going to have several additional layers on it before it is done. Thus, adding to the overall size. Bonehead move. I said earlier that I don't read 'The Key.' That's not completely true. While I'm taring it up and crunching it into balls I do read some of the ads. Here is one of my favorites. It is for a company that provides a novelty service for birthdays, childbirths, graduations, etc. They will fill people's lawns with zany and wacky plywood cutouts of cartoon characters while the "victim" is away at work or sleeping. Then, when the victim comes home or goes outside to get the newspaper (not The Key, that comes in the mail) he will be shocked and delighted to find 50 wooded penguins adorning their lawn to remind him that it's his 50th birthday. At that point, hijinks are bound to ensue.

I fashioned the balls together to form a body piece and tail piece. I use lots of masking tape to fix them together. Then I use a piece of wire clothes hanger to give the piece a bit more structural integrity. Then I cover the whole thing with lots of masking tape. I go through a lot of tape. Remember the movie "Mommy Dearest" with Fey Dunaway playing the role of Joan Crawford? Well that movie must have really had an effect on this country because wire clothes hangers are really hard to find nowadays. Whenever I do see some, usually at a garage sale, I buy them all. I recommend that you do the same. But for the love of God, don't use them to hang clothes.

The body and tail were just balls of newspaper and didn't really have any structural integrity (if I sat on them, they'd flatten). So to make them hard, like rocks, I covered them in paper mache using newsprint. It's not really paper mache that I'm did here since I'm not using any paper pulp. But since I'm calling 'The Key' a newspaper when it really isn't I can probably call this technique 'paper mache' even though it really isn't. I started with a large bowl and put in some bleached flour and add warm water. It was important to me that the water be warm because my hands were going to be in there and warm goo feels better than cold goo. I used a wire wisk to beat the flour and water into a paste, removing all lumps. I made the consistency like that of a crepe batter (a thin pancake batter, for those of you in the mid-west). Now I needed to tare strips of newspaper. Mostly, I made wide strips, like half a page wide. But I did make some narrower strips too.

Now the fun part. Stealing liberaly from the techniques in Dan Reader's books I got my hands completely wet with the paste and messaged the paste onto the ball so that the ball was completely wet. Then I covered the wet ball with a strip of DRY newspaper. Then I wet that piece of newspaper and applied another strip. It was important to 1) not put the paper into the paste, instead put the paste onto the paper 2) not apply the next piece of paper until the layer underneath is completely wet. I repeated this until there are about 8 to 10 total layers of newspaper on each piece. I made sure not to make 7 or 11 layers because those are "bad" numbers. I put the pieces on a cookie sheet and placed them outside to dry. In the hot Summer sun it took about two full afternoons for them to dry completely. When they were dry, they were very hard.

While my balls were drying I set off to construct the sardine can that Sally would spend most of her time in. Using the proportions determined from the sketches, I made a template out of cardboard for the bottom of the sardine can. The stuff that most people refer to as "cardboard" isn't actually cardboard. It is called "corrugated paper." You know when you buy a notepad or notebook there is usually a stiff piece of board in the back to give the pad some stiffness so it is easier to write on? Well that stuff is "cardboard." The material that makes-up a "cardboard box" is actually "corrugated paper" and a "cardboard box" is properly called a "corrugated carton." "Corrugated paper" is a piece of convoluted paper (i.e. it looks like a wavy line) sandwhiched between two pieces of paper. I learned all of this while I worked at a corrugated box factory for two summers during college. But since I am calling 'The Key" a newspaper and a 'paper layering technique' papier mache I have no problem calling 'corrugated paper' cardboard from here on. Why break precident? I found some scrap plywood in the garage and, with the help of a jigsaw, cut out the bottom of the sardine can.

I used some more cardboard to form the walls of the sardine can. I made a double layer to create a good thickness (plenty of glue between the layers) and attached the walls to the plywood with a staplegun. I covered the staples with masking tape so they would not cause any unusual texture after paper mache-ing. To create the rolled lip around the edge of the sardine can I used an old section of coaxial cable. I taped this to the edge to hold it in place until it is covered with paper. On the Smelly Sally card, the sardine can is open which creates a torn-away feature on the inside of the can. I used more cardboard to do this by tracing the perimeter of the sardine can and making a jagged-edge. This piece was then glued and taped into place.

At this point it was time to remove the head from the original doll’s body. To do this, I like to light some candles and turn the lights down. I then lay the doll upon the alter. The actual head removal takes only a few seconds so it is best to draw it out as much as possible with theatrics. The heads of these dolls are attached with a regular nylon zip-tie. So a quick snip with a razor and the head is removed. I seems very painless and peaceful.

Since my balls were now dry I could attach the body ball to the tail. With a razor knife I cut a hole in the tail piece to accept the body ball. I used some glue and lots of tape. It was important to give the body a nice hour-glass shape. Next, I marked and fit the hole for the head. I couldn’t make the arms quite yet because they needed to be a specific length so that the left arm would touch the sardine car correctly. So I had to work a bit more on the sardine can, particularly the roll and key.

To make the roll I used a piece of posterboard rolled-up and taped. Then I used more wire clothes hanger to create the key. I covered the wire with newspaper and lots of tape. I closed both ends of the roll with a circle of cardboard and inserted the key into one end through a hole that I cut. The key was glued and held in place by lots of tape. Now I could determine the length of the arms by positioning the body inside the sardine can and holding the roll in place.

Now that I knew how long the arms should be I balled-up some newspaper: 2 balls for each arm and 1 ball for each hand. I taped each arm together in the correct pose as per the card. For fingers I used some balls of Scupey instead of paper. On my last GPK sculpture I used paper and did not like how the fingers turned out. Each finger was then held in place by hotglue and lots of tape. I did not yet attach the arms to the body because I still had a lot to do with the tail and did not want extra nonsense getting in the way.

To create the fish-tail I used pieces of wire clothes hangers to create the “skeleton of the tail. I then used techniques popularized by Dan Reader to cover the tail with a piece of old bedsheet soaked in thinned white glue: I cut a piece of sheet to size and dipped it into a container of slightly thinned white glue. I squeezed out the excess and carefully laid the clothe over the wire frame. I pushed the clothe in a bit with my finger between each piece of wire to create a realistic effect. I let this dry overnight. Once dry, I trimmed it with scissors to make the shape of the finished fishtail.

For the scales on the tail I again used Dan Reeder’s techniques. I cut about 150 3cm squares out of old bedsheet. I readied my container of thinned white glue and hung the body from a wire on the ceiling to make it easier to work with. I soaked a handful of squares in the glue and squeezed out as much glue as possible. Each scale is a single square, with two corners folded in, to create somewhat of a triangle. The scale is placed on the tail with the folds down starting at the tail end and working up to the torso. The residual glue holds the scale in place. This was very time consuming and was done in three sessions, allowing some to dry overnight and then proceeding the next day.

Once the tail was dry I could attached the arms. I did this with glue and lots of masking tape.

Using glue I attached the roll/key piece to the sardine can itself.

At this point the body and sardine can are ready for the paper mache skin. For this I like to use wallpaper glue and paper towels. The best paper towels I have found are made by Kimberly Clark. They are called Shop Towels and they are blue. The reason I like these is that they are very strong, flexible and stretchy. They can easily traverse any corner without causing a crease. I like to use wallpaper paste that is specifically for bathrooms and kitchens because it has anti-fungal agents in it. I tear the shop towel into little bits and discard any of the edges. Using a paintbrush I coat the entire piece in paste. Then, as I apply them, I coat each papertowel piece with paste and smooth it on with the paintbrush. Each piece overlaps until the enter sardine can, arms, and torso are covered. This dried overnight and then got a second coat of papertowels.

Once the second coat of papertowel dried I brushed on a coat of straight white glue. Thinned white glue will not work here because the water causes the papertowel to swell, potentially disfiguring the work. Once that coat was dry, a second was applied in the same manner. The glue acts to seal the paper and also fills-in any uneven blemishes. The paper towels have a definite texture that is unwanted. The glue fills that in and makes it smooth.

Once the glue is dry, I lightly sanded the piece with 220 grit sandpaper. I used a tack cloth to remove any dust and also blew the whole thing off with compressed air to further remove dust.

Then all of the blue areas got two coats of gesso. I find no need to gesso the clothe parts since 1) they are already white 2) they have sufficient texture to forcefully adhere the paint.

I have no idea how to braid hair. And I’m very proud of that fact. So I had my wife braid two pigtails onto the sides of the doll’s head. She held them in place with two small rubber bands. I pushed a piece of wire through the tip of one braid, through the braid itself, through the skull and “brain” and on through the braid on the other side. This would allow the braids to be poseable. The braids were finished off with two blue bows. How pretty.

To create the name plate, I printed the text from my computer. The font that best fits the Garbage Pail Kids style is Times New Roman. I measured the text to get an idea of how big the name plate would be. I cut out two pieces of cardboard. One piece would be the black “outline” and was slightly larger than the other. Each piece was covered with paper towels and given two coats of white glue. I sanded with 220 grit sandpaper and gave two coats of gesso. The smaller of the two pieces was dedicated to receive the text. So I positioned the text over the name plate with a sheet of carbon paper in between. Then I traced the lettering so it would transfer to the name plate. I then went over the outline with a black Sharpie. I did this before painting because I knew that the paint color (bright yellow) would not cover the marker completely. So I could get two coats of paint on the name plate and still be able to see the marker underneath, which I could fill-in with black paint. The other, larger piece was simply painted black. Once dry, both pieces were glued together to create a stylized 3D nameplate.

Painting of the sardine can involved metallic paints, silver and bronze. These types of paints are notorious for not providing good coverage. So I gave the entire sardine can an undercoat of regular paint that would provide a good backdrop for the metallic paints. I printed the words “FRESH SARDINES” from my computer and transferred these to the sides of the can using carbon paper. Red paint was used to finish the lettering along with a black outline.

I first put an undercoat of blue on the tail using acrylic paint. My intention was that I would then spray over the tail in silver and the blue would show through as a highlight from under the scales. It was a good theory. I thinned the silver acrylic paint with glass cleaner as I always do and loaded my air brush. For the first few minutes the paint ran through the airbrush acceptably. But it went downhill fast from there. The silver paint has metallic small flakes in it which clog the tip of the airbrush. So I had to resort to plan B. I had some silver spray paint left over from another project. So I painted the tail with that instead. The spray paint was a little too shiny and a little too metallic looking from my tastes. But it did the job and looked alright. Once the spray paint was dry I covered the entire body and tail with glitter spray, concentrating and putting a heavier coat on the tail and fin. While cleaning my airbrush, the trigger and a small internal part slipped out of my grasp and fell down into the garbage disposal in the sink. I spent about 20 minutes fishing the parts out of the drain. I allowed the body and tail to dry overnight while I fretted over whether or not the tail color was too similar to the color of the sardine can (which I was). So to combat this, I prepared a dilute wash of black paint by mixing a squirt of paint with a few drops of water. I dipped a rag in the wash and wiped it onto the silver parts of the sardine can, purposefully avoiding the bronze parts. I let it dry a few seconds and wiped it off with a dry towel. I felt that this toned down the silver color enough. I allowed the sardine and the body and tail to dry overnight. Between the problem with the airbrush, having to fish out my airbrush parts from the smelly garbage disposal, and the colors not looking right, my anxiety level increased four-fold in a matter of an hour.

I tried really hard to find real dried starfish for the bra. I searched every craft store in the area. And while they do carry dried starfish, I could not find any that were small enough (about 4.5cm max) for this project. There are two types of stores that I do not enjoy going into. The first is video games stores. These places are nerd-central (in fact, my wife refers to them as "nerd-stores"). And, while I do enjoy an occassional video game, I do not consider myself of the same ilk as the people that frequent these places. This, coupled with the fact that the clerks at video game stores are, what I would consider, "overly friendly," makes video game stores one of my two least favorite retail areas. The second type of store that I don't like is craft stores. These are frequented by women, some artsy-types which I don't mind, but also a lot of what I like to call "scrap booking moms." The Scrap Booking Moms (SBM's) make me very uncomfortable and give me anxiety. Partly because they are constantly in my way, blocking the paint isle, for example, with their shopping cart (who the heck is buying so much stuff at a craft store that they need a cart?). But also because it is such an overall feminine place and I am, quite frankly, a straight male who, as I have been told, "looks a little gay." All of this makes me very uneasy. So anyway, I couldn't find real starfish that were the right size. So instead, I made two starfish from Sculpey. Sculpey is a polymer clay that is baked in a household oven. I covered the starfish with papertowel-mache, painted the starfish, and glued them in place. For the straps of the bra, I used tiny seashells that were glued into place.

The body, sardine can, and name plate were given one coat of glossy water-based polyurethane. I like to use this becase it dries very fast, it will not turn yellow like oil-based polyurethane, and I like the way it looks. Once the first coat was dry I assembled the entire sculpture by gluing (white glue) the body in place, gluing the head on, and gluing the nameplate in place. Once the glue was dry, I gave the entire sculture a second coat of polyurethane. I did't like the way this thing looked and I was very bummed out about it. But not everything can be a success.

Presenting: "Smelly Sally #108a"

Trashed Tracy

2006-07-09T19:48:00.000-05:00

My current paper mache (PM) project is inspired by the 1980's pop-culture icons Garbage Pail Kids. Since I recently found 4 old Cabbage Patch Dolls at a yard sale I suspect that my next few projects will be along this line as well. My current sculpture is based upon "Trashed Tracy" which is card #129b in Series 4 #. I started it a month ago and, while it seems simple enough, it has lots of individual parts so it is taking longer than I anticipated.

The preparation of the doll was satisfying. I've always wanted to tear the head off of one of those things. They are just so creapy looking. I don't inderstand why children enjoyed them so much during the height of their popularity some twenty years ago.

The head is attached to the fabric body by a ordinary nylon "zip tie." It is not unlike the ones found in the electrical section of Home Depot. A quick snip of the tie and the head came right off. No fanfare, but certainly satisfying.

It's Grim Reaper!

2006-06-10T17:13:00.000-05:00

I finished a grim reaper sculpture today and it turned out OK. I painted it pink instead of black because I like pink better and I had extra pink paint. I started out by making a base and armature out of scrap wood. The head and jaw were made from a ball of newspaper and papier mache. For the hands, I made bone shapes out of Sculpey and mounted them with wire. Then I papier mache'd over them. I thought that the grim reaper shoud wear sneakers because they would be more comfortable than other types of footwear. So I made sneakers out of paper mache. The sickle (is that how it is spelled?) is made from a piece of plywood and some cardboard covered in paper mache. The flower in his hair is made of Sculpey and covered with paper mache.

To make the cloak, I used an old bedsheet soaked in glue. When dry, this is very stiff. All of the creases made it difficult to paint.

Grim Reapers are usually portrayed as sad little guys. This is probably because their job is so stressful and...well...grim. But I'l bet there are plenty of really happy grim reapers.

Fallen Hero

2006-04-20T17:54:00.000-05:00

I made a sculpture of what might happen to a superhero after retirement. It is made of newspaper and glue and clothe and cigarettes that my boss gave me (I don't smoke, myself). I gave the sculpture to my grandfather. He seems to like it.

Killer Bass

2006-03-20T18:49:00.000-05:00

I made a fish and gave it to my dad (he likes to go fishing). It is made of newspaper and cloth and glue. It is about 36" long. It is hanging at my parent's house. They seem to like it.

Pac Man Fever is better than Ebola

2005-12-26T13:00:00.000-05:00

These are made from "strip" papier mache over balloons...very 3rd grade. I have fond memories of Pac Man from growing up in the 1980's. A bit of trivia: the official names of each ghost are: RED Shadow/"Blinky", PINK Speedy/"Pinky", Blue Bashfull/"Inky," Orange Pokey/"Clyde."